Women You Need In Your Life.


Kimmy Gibbler

Historically, sitcoms have operated under the idea that the sidekick is funnier than the star (ex: Karen versus Grace, Rhoda versus Mary). Iconic 90’s television hit, Full House, stayed faithful to this formula by creating the life-altering character of Kimmy Gibbler. Playing the best friend of D.J. Tanner, Kimmy became known for her brilliant insults and insane fashions. Whereas D.J. was better known for her moralistic behavior and her predilection towards stress-eating, Gibbler was the wild card, bursting into the Tanner’s house and ripping everyone a much-deserved new asshole.

And her clothes…there’s almost no words. Poofy dresses, brightly-colored tights, obnoxious accessories. Her outfits defied logic/any kind of tasteful sensibilities. Often, Kimmy would resemble a conceptual art piece rather than an actual human being. Genius.


Bijou Phillips

Bijou Fucking Phillips. Obsessed. Always have been, always will. This girl’s on acid…seriously. Think Paris Hilton but with personality and the ability to make facial expressions. She’s the progeny of John Phillips (who apparently liked to have sex with his daughters? UH-OH.) and Mama babe Michelle Phillips. In the 90’s, she was a total fixture of the party scene. She used this little bit of notoriety and parlayed it into starring in movies with direct-to-video queen, Dominique Swain, and recording albums that seriously five people bought. Even though Bijou has never really “made it”, it doesn’t really matter because she’s sexy, insane and says weird shit in interviews that keep me Googling her name on a continuous basis. Today, she’s the full-time girlfriend of Danny Masterson. They even graced the cover of Paper magazine together last year. The last thing she starred in that I could see in an actual theatre rather than at the racks of Blockbuster, was Hostel II.  Which was just weird,


2 Responses to “Women You Need In Your Life.”

  1. Aunt Laurie Says:

    Oh, Ryan, you’re such a hoot. I love your writing!

    I think you’d enjoy My Crumbling Empire, the blog of Ami, a young woman we know.

    Everything on it is great, but you share a fascination with Ms. Gibbler, and that’s a decent place to start:


    Kudos on the ace academics!

  2. ryanohh Says:

    Ha! That blog was hilarious. I’m glad you like my blog. I also write over at this blog, Flavorpill/Flavorwire, sometimes that you should check out and I start a new internship next week with this website: http://www.jezebel.com that i think you’ll luv. miss you guysss

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